Saturday, August 29, 2009

Incidentalish Notificatiating, not all football














1. Google really stinks sometimes. I wanted a picture of The Duke (fig. 1) and thus typed "The Duke" into Google. All I got was John Wayne and some other knucklehead who thinks he's called The Duke. Then, Google Images even found me some crap soldier from a cheezy movie character called The Duke. And not the cool Duke from GI Joe. Google didn't come up with a single thing that was on topic until I typed the word "football" into the search. This is unacceptable. Google isn't going to live up to its promise until it is able to know what I mean all the time, even if I don't say it clearly.

2. Matthew Stafford is looking pretty decent. I think the punditry that believes Culpepper should start is probably right. But Stafford looks like he's got this mostly under control. As much as you can expect from a guy in his position. More than Sanchez. But, then again, Indy's defense isn't Baltimore's. But I still see this Stafford thing working out ok.

3. Memphis kicks ass. Your town doesn't have Graceland. Or Stax. And I don't care where you're from or what you think, our BBQ is way better than yours. I'm not saying it's the best city in the history of the universe. I'm just saying that Memphis kicks ass.

4. People complain about all the stops in a football game. When else are you going to go do all the other stuff that you need to do? I mean, damn, the games are on for 9 hours in a row some days. You've got to get some other stuff done. I've so far only been watching for 3 hours and 36 minutes and I've cleaned the whole house, eaten two meals, aired out the rugs, did all the dishes, and been writing this craziness. Commercials suck. Watching football is the best way to get things done.

5. "More better" is not proper English. I'm talking to you, J.T. "The Brick" from Raiders Television Network. And anybody else who wants their English to get more better. The er takes care of the more. It's like Bigger and Deffer. You just get bigger. Like when you take steroids, which, kids, makes you stupider, too. Now, big we can understand, so bigger makes sense. Def we can understand, so deffer makes sense. Along those lines, if we have better, what's bett? Somebody get me an etymology.

6. The Raiders need a new stadium. I'm not saying that they deserve one, but they field they play on looks like trash. Sharing a stadium with a baseball team is, at the very least, horrific for the aesthetics of the field. Only god knows what playing on it is like.

7. At some point recently, I made a list of things I would buy next time I had some superfluous money. Which frankly makes no sense in the middle of a recession. But my only two items were wireless video game controllers and more visors. I need to reprioritize. What I need is an XBOX 360, so I could become a professional Madden player. That'd be sweet.

8. Sometimes, the best art is the kind of art that's good to look at for about 20 seconds and then be able to forget about.

9. It's actually true. The early Black Eyed Peas stuff is pretty dope. I just got my hands on Behind The Front, their 1998 debut. So far, I'm impressed. Which makes that 3 for 3 with J5 and Dilated. They never stopped making good hip hop in California.

10. That lost ball wasn't JaMarcus Russell's fault. You need better blocking on the end of that line. Someone coming all that far around the end should be able to be pushed out of the way. That tackle needs to sort that out.

11. The left side of the Saints' O-line needs to block better. That screen at about 5:00 of the 1st quarter could've gone for 10 more yards if those two would've blocked better.

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