I'm a Specialist in Mediocrity.

I believe I owe you all an apology.

My predictions for this week were of utter mediocrity.

I was 7-7.

This is pathetic.

Let it be said that I do not in any way endorse this act of repugnant underachievement. The authorial staff of this periodical believe to the utmost in performance at a higher level.

It is to be expected.

Allow me to apologize.

I am sorry.

What makes it worse is that I even tied my Fantasy Football game. And, if that weren't bad enough, I sat Donovan McNabb for fear of his fragility and he went out and put an old style 157.2 Passer Rating beat down on the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. If I'd have played him, I'd have won.

Damn.

Sorry Donovan. I'll never complain about you being injury-prone again.

A Standard of Preparation for Public Speaking.

You have to be done before you start.

Kids. Don't Do This At Home.

My family is New Mexican.

Look it up.

If I ever get to start a street gang, I'm going to call it Gringos Peligrosos.

Cause that's sort of what I am.

A Dangerous Honkey.

Sort of.