Shalom, friends. I have a few things to say before I forget, so here goes.
I was 10-4 with my predictions last week. I don't know how good Vegas did with their predictions, but I think 10-4 is pretty good for a first try. That's a much better percentage than James Caan had last week on NFL Total Access, and I'm not even an actor. Tune in for this week's predictions.
Last week's predictions started a little back-and-forth with someone I will keep anonymous. He's a NY Giants fan, and I'd hate for that information to sully his otherwise solid reputation. And I don't want him to think that I don't enjoy every second of those exchanges.
This past week, he reminded me, without remorse, of the utter grotesquery of my beloved Titans, with a side dish of how good the Giants are. He's right. We really stink, and they're really good, but I still hope Eli gets some mental fasciitis somewhere in November and the Eagles can score some touchdowns 1, 2, 3.
But, in good faith, I believe that I should honor his team's excellence by, as he asked, saying something nice about the Giants. I'm going all in and saying three nice things about the Giants.
Take a photo, send a memo, call your parents, because I'm not doing this again.
Three Nice Things About the Giants
1. Bill Parcells is my all-time favorite coach. Mainly because he's called The Big Tuna, but also because his football genius is limitless. That's why you lift all them weights.
2. Lawrence Taylor is the first person I'd take to a brawl. If it weren't for Richard Marvin Butkus and John Harold Lambert, I'd call him the greatest linebacker ever. I still might.
3. Eli actually looks like he belongs in his big brother's league.